Warren: "How does it feel to be the company's worst nightmare on your first day?"

Terri: "And, Warren, I'll think about that problem you seem to have with women."

Lulu: "A lot of people don't know how to turn a waffle into a witch."

Lulu: "Thief 3: The action game that violates a different commandment."

Ian: "There's something about monkeys. They're just funny."

Randy: "You're just saying that cuz he's Irish and you're Scottish, right?"
Ian: "I love all the people of the world."
Everyone: "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha."
Ian: "That wasn't supposed to be funny."

Ian: "You must address me as Junior Sport."

Ian: "I need to visit the bathroom."
Randy: "Hold on, we're almost done this meeting..."
[10 minutes later]
Ian: "Can I go to the toilet now?"
Chris: "MAY you."
Ian: "MAY I go to the toilet now?"
Chris: NO, you may not."

Terri: "I'm having some trouble hearing Ian over the speaker phone."
Ian: "It's the Scottish accent. American phones don't pick it up that well."

Rob (heard yelling from down the hall): "Oh no he's going to an ogre!!"

Chad: "given the fact that I managed to get salad in my hair at the last meeting, I don't think I'll risk eating in front of people for, oh...about the rest of my life. I'll feed myself, thanks."

Emil: "If ever I'm playing a video game and my character says 'Taste the Rainbow of Fruit Flavor', I might have to kill myself."

Emil: "Just thought I'd let everyone know that my wife is expecting (yes, a baby). Come November, I'll have another little monster running around. Now that's what I call an emergent situation!"

Randy: "Beer. It's not just for Fridays anymore."

Terri: "It's like 'Honest Earthman'. It's like the name an alien would make up to blend in with human society. 'I'm Frank Terran. No need to be suspicious of me!'"

Terri (threatening, re: her pregnancy): "Just wait 'til the frost baby comes."

Jerome (via e-mail): "Anyone here drive a Black BMW - skinny tires?"
Harvey (via e-mail): "did you hit warren's car???"

Randy: "Everything should be ass."

Emil: "You might want to stop by the design pit to hear Jerome rapping to the Matlock theme."

Randy: "I'm gonna carve my niche in the games industry with filthy language."

Dane (looking at the new project server): "That looks like something that should have a tribe of monkeys worshipping it...which is actually pretty much what will happen when you get the thing up and running...."

Brian: "I haven't taken any hallucinogens for several hours now."
Randy: "this is the kind of dedication we like to see in our employees here at ISA. everyone should take note."

Randy: "Wiggling is important"

Terri: "Why does any prophesy have to come true? If Nosferatu predicted World War II... no wait, who did that? Nostradamus."

William: "Whoa... LOTS of carnivorous mammals..."

Jerome: "Feces is reusable, too, man."

Randy: "How come Popeye can squeeze open cans of spinach BEFORE he eats the spinach?"
Raby: "He's got those huge forearms."
Terry: "From all those years 'at sea.'"

Emil: "So I'm going to go to the bathroom, do you still want to look at that space?"

Laura: "wending wending wending keep those doccies wending wending wending wending rawhide!"

Randy: "I was responding to my review comments."
Serg: "Well that was really bugging the shit out of me!"

Randy: "One dangerous looking woman to be used occasionally would be very cool."

Emil: "I like them. I'm high."

David (RE: surgically combining David and Jerome): "Jerome would have to become vegetarian. I would have to learn to rap."

Chris C.: "I suppose an exclusivity deal is risky in the "we could be walking away from a lot of money" sense, but I tend to prioritize risk of disaster over risk of missing out on vast success."

Randy: (RE: Linkin Park's Xbox deal) "I love it when 'artists' fake enthusiasm for whoring themselves out."
Mike D.: "Hey, I AM happy to be working on this fish beast thing for Thief!"

Brian S. (via email): "...We don't want AI changes to DX2 to break T3 just because it's in a separate package that isn't source-controlled and separate between the projects. Good point, we should definitely make sure we've planned for this."
Randy: "i didn't understand everything you said, but i take it i'm very smart. since that's all i wanted to hear anyway, no need to explain."

Paul: (via email) "Also, remember that the 3-months estimate is a minimum... I expect it to expand by approximately 2 weeks for every ounce of crack smoked by the T3 design team :)"
Randy: "uh oh..."
Lulu: "don't worry, Randy, an ounce of crack is an awful lot. if he'd said 'five-dollar sack' then we'd be in trouble."

Randy: (via email) "let's take a vote: should i fire jerome?"
David: "With the way Jerome sticks to schedules, if you fired him today he wouldn't have his desk cleaned out until Thief III ships anyways... so... might as well keep him."

Nate: "I was trying to show off that one guard could cast a shadow on to another, even if it meant implying sexual tension between them."

Heather: "I need a better goodness."

Emil: (holding one shoe) "Oh, sure, I can get my map running on the projector. I mean, I can only find one of my shoes, but..."

Alex C: The bow still has some issues. My rough analysis of the problem is that the bow sucks...a lot.

Jerome: Dude, and I'd reverse it so instead of trying to save the Lemmings, you'll be trying to kill them, and there'll be all these badass tools of destruction, and --
David: ...
David: ...
David: You are not well.

Jordan: So, with gridsnap.net, I think you've gotta have a logo that reflects the grid as your tool, as if you breathe life into it, or..
Jerome: So like, words with vertexes aligned to the grid, saying “gridsnap”..
Jordan (unconsciously): Something along those lines, yeah...
Jordan: Kill me.

Jerome: No dude, I used to have a pair of soft ‘chucks that I used to carry around ... when I was a ninja.

Andy: I went to Crown & Anchor, and I didn't drink ... and I felt dirty.

Andy: I'm all about diversity, and ... all that shit.

Randy: When she steals their power... they go crazy. When she steals their skins, they die, from ... lack of skin.

David: I'm not that short... I'll have you know that I'm on the bottom end of average.

Jerome: Check it out, I'm Bruce Lee! Woop! Wyeaaaawww... Ppp... ppp...
Jordan: You were probably spawned whole from a pool of cartoon-juice.

Jerome: (long player experience idea) ... It'd be bad ass.
Jordan: You've just single handedly butchered the whole of Thief fiction.
Jerome: That was Thiefy!
Jordan: What, Arnold Schwarzenegger and a Harrier!?

Jerome: Dude, she's getting her claws into you! Pretty soon she'll be like, ‘Andy, we've known each other a long time...and we have a puppy...”
Emil: And then, you turn into me.

Andy: I think I'm unknowingly the most offensive person in the office.

Jerome: ....dude, I want to go home, to California, and eat bread ... and play with my dog.

Doug: The world is full of people doing things.

David: I want to eat a person just once and then I will go back to eating grass.

Kristine: Excel made me cry once.

Lulu: Emil is to pirates as David is to dead people.

Ian - RE: memory constraints on the xbox: "Well I could just get a bunch of stuffed animals and a small box."

Randy: "Actually, it would be cool if we DIDN'T do that, cuz that way we wouldn't need a progress bar in between frames."

Ian: That's why when you're born you're told "welcome to life" and not "welcome to happy fun land".

Jordan: "Beyond that, we could always buy a lawn gnome and paint its eyes red to suggest infravision. The downside of such an act is that we would probably not get into heaven."

Ian: it's just like real life.
Like if you were leaning and I shoved a big bookcase under your arm.
What you'd do is move to a bigger room and try to shake the bookcase off.

Hugh: There is “more than tweaking but not redoing. It's somewhere in between”.

Peter Marquardt: Anybody feel like hell after getting their shot? I'm dizzy and hot!"

David R: "He didn't really.. He couldn't.. He had trouble..."
Heather: "Verbalizing?"
David R: "ARG!"

Heather: Is there any West Quarter info?
Jordan: The West Quarter is probably populated by clowns of almost solicitous kindness, fuzzy white bunnies (with pink noses), and muppets. The inhabitants of The City are so fond of their pervasive grit that they shoved everything sweet & congenial into the West Quarter to await execution.

Jordan: I'm certain that at this moment, I'm being added to the FBI's "Ten most laughable" list.
Flee, lest I smite thee with my harmless foam katana.

Dave K: Oh, come on. Taco Bell is perfectly acceptable food. It just....hurts, sometimes.

Kristine: I spent Christmas in London.
Jerome: It must have been dope. Seeing the Eiffel Tower all lit up and shit.

Serg: "The other thing we can do is just skin a dog. So... if you can imagine a dog with make-up on..."

Alex D: "I like to pre-emptively worry."

Warren: (something to the effect of) They look so much better than us.
Sergio: "That's because they shipped."

Jerome (to Warren): It's time to update my tag name (crash). S2000 what's up."

Jordan: Have you been to the Natural Bridge Caverns?
David: Nah ... I don't go out, really.

Emil: Hey, it wasn't a mullet! It was a Southie Cut!!
Jordan: Semantics do not deter the fashion police, mon ami.

Jerome: Yeah ... I talk a big game ... but then I go home and watch Care Bears.

Jordan: I like those elegant, one-word titles. Thief was good. We need one of those.
Emil: Yeah, I was thinking the same thing. Or maybe, "Adventure in the Emilac Bay."
Jordan: Erotic Adventures in the Emiliac Bay.
Emil: They don't call me Big Red for nothin'.
Jordan: Congratulations, E. Your words shall echo in my nightmares.

Jerome: No, I mean, I have never seen someone else's unit.

Jordan: It's like a severed head in a tornado. No matter where it goes from here, it gets messy.

Josh: Any movie can be improved with scant nudity. They have to wear pants to begin with, though. I mean, like Porky Pig... every once in a while you see him without that little vest, and then it's like oooooooh yeah... (Josh proceeds to pantomime Porky Pig rubbing his own nipples.)

Emil: Oh my God...I always thought that when I died I wanted to be cremated. Now I realize the truth...I want to be stuffed, so the whole world can appreciate me.
Jordan: Alright, but if the resulting taxidermy starts to emit a stench, I'm setting it on fire and driving until I run out of gas.

Jerome: You can't wish, at this point. There is no wish list.
Jordan: Santa is not coming.
Jerome: Somebody better get out the gluesticks and glitter. We're making our own Christmas this year.

Jordan: You two are splattering my desk with your bonding experience.
Josh: ...
Heather: ...
Josh: You wanted only black in your cradle as a baby, didn't you.

Jerome:
Yo, he's Warren Spector
The gameplay injector,
Eatin' other companies like Hannibal Lector
Warren: You be stylin'. (leaves)
Jordan: Okay, I think it'd be best if you never do anything that causes Warren to say that ever again.

Heather: Fancy burricks are afraid of dogs, if they encounter each other the dog barks and the burricks poop.

Jordan: All my little pets are dead.

Raby: (pats Josh on the belly affectionately)
Josh: Wh- whoa. Okay, guys don't pat the pudge, okay?

Jordan: I feel like hibernating for a month.
Emil: I just hibernated for half a week. It's overrated.
Jordan: I don't mean ‘recline in a sickly, wailing foetal cower' ... I can do that at work.

Jordan: In general, messing about with corpses causes catastrophe.

Steve: (Shows Josh his Docks map, inside some tunnels)
Josh: Are... you inside someone's colon, or something?

Jerome: Yo, can I borrow someone's ass-badge (security card.)?
Nate: You can borrow my ass.

Ian: I live in a gray world ... and I like to define it in black and white.

Jordan: Uh, Jerome... did you log onto my PC and download the Gummi Bears theme song, in German?
Jerome: Uh... yeah. It's a dope track.

Steve: Piece of skin in drink
I think that it is rotten
Now I eat starburst

Jordan: Jerome, could you just not piss-shiver in close proximity to my body?

Tim L: It's (Thief3) going to ship with dramamine.

Jordan (via ICQ): repeat after me, in chant -- there is no meeting... there is only time and place.... there is no workload, there is only action and stillness ... Ohmmmmmmmm

Kent: I was going to dye my hair bright red next, but you already did.
Randy: Right, then people wouldn't be able to tell us apart. I'd be changing levels on DX2 and you'd be making calls on T3.
Kent: Yeah, really bad calls, like: let's go to FOURTH person.

Jerome: Hey, did you see that thing on CNN [about the siamese twins]? If they can separate babies' heads in four days, I can separate the museum... in THREE.

Jordan: Hey do you have any idea why all the designers are gone and the design pit smells like urine?

Terry: "Technology sucks. Except, well... if you don't have to use it, then it's great!"

Steve: “It's not officially quiet time yet. So shut the f—k up!”

Jerome: “Now I have no lunch partner. David? No. Rob? No. Steven? Gone. Chris Cobb? Surly.”

Steve: “Hey, let's go fill our water bottles together.”
Jerome: “Okay! Hey, I have to pee, you wanna go?”
Steve: “No.”

Jordan: “We are not in Game Development. We are playing the Development Game.”

Gabe: “That's how you sell your game, man - give ‘em a little kibble ...”
Jerome: “... and then they tear you to BITS, mothafucka!.”

Heather: (handling a snake) “Don't pee on me... snake pee smells.”
Steve: “...But it tastes SO GOOD!”

Jerome: “I like to think that I distract everybody equally...”

Jerome: “It's quiet time so that y'all can hear me.”

Kristine: “One of these days I am going to North Dakota and raise chickens or something. Okay, maybe not chickens. They are gross.”

Jeremy: “You know, the chick on the raisins box is kinda hot.”
Jordan: “Another pearl of wisdom...”
Jerome: “What? I'm just making a point...”

Jordan: "I'm not hesitating, I'm multi-tasking. Loading, please wait..."

Jordan (upon seeing informing working in Castle map): "Ah Kalina, I should write him a love letter."

Heather: "I can't frob my package!"

Dave K: "Looking back, I'm not quite sure how we managed to destroy the Unreal editor as completely as we did."

Ian: "Randy, when you look at me like that, I feel like I am poking a baby with a knife..."

Jordan: Yeah, the first City Section will be built much like the Haunted House.
Randy: You mean like... in a weekend?

Jerome: I hate that little redhead bitch!!
Jordan: Really? I actually thought he was the best actor of the group.
Jerome: I like that young chick.
Jordan: ...
Jerome: ...
Jerome: Leave me alone.

Jerome: Dude, if I was Shakira, I'd rip my shirt off at my concert and go YAAAAARRRRRLLLLGGGGGG!!!! I AM POWERFUL!!!!

David: What were you going to say dude?
Jordan: I was going to say "I need to get in my requisite Flesh Slam in for the day," but that just would have sounded bad.

Jordan: I can just look at that picture [of my dog] and be soothed. Just look at him... he doesn't have to worry about framerate.
Jerome: Yeah, he just has to worry about eating his food and licking his own ass.
Jordan: Well, I have at least half of that down already.

Steve: Yeah... it's like you walk into a room and there's this giant meat cube!
Jordan and Steve:
Steve: I can see David over there - he's contemplating "porksword"...
Jordan: ...and "hambat"...
Steve: The wheels are turning!
David: You guys are never allowed to put Easter Eggs in our games. Ever.

Jerome: Hey like... imagine if I was like at GDC, and I was like this total Bad Ass designer... and I uhh... and like... no wait... and I... uhhh... uhh...
David: No dude, that'll never happen.

Heather: (re: girlscouts) ...yeah, looking back I'd say my troop leader was almost certainly gay.
Jerome: Damn, I'd like to be in that troop, you know what I'm sayin'? I wonder what kind of badges she gives out.

Jerome: Ok, if there's one thing I can do quickly, it's make things look like shit.

James: That's nice, but I'm not here to discuss Chris's white pee.

Chris (via email): Do any of you know of a good doctor in the area that you'd recommend? Just a general practice Doctor. Thanks!
Jerome: The only Dr. I know is Dre ... I can hook you up with some tracks, yo

Jordan: I just like walking around and flashing people.

Jerome: What's up dude? Want to rub my nipples? They're sweaty.

Steve: Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.
David: Well, I don't like you when you're not angry, so what you mean to say is that I'd like you less.

David: Petting animals decreases stress.
Steve: So does stomping them.

Jordan: The real issue here is that nobody cares about dead hookers.

Raby: I just wanted to come in and see you with your pants off.

Jerome: Dude, going to jail is dope!

Nate: Playing with dead bodies has never been so satisfying.

Jerome: You know Steve, I have something in my pocket for you.
Nate: Is it a party?

Jerome: What? I flush toilets with my mouth and I'm not sick.

Gabe: Nate just has a need to walk around naked.

(Alizee video playing on Jerome's monitor)
Elan: Don't you have any Bauhaus?
Jerome: Some who-house?!

Sarah: if a cookie monster eats cookies, then a monte monster eats monte's? maybe just montybites. tho it would be entertaining to see monte beat back the attack of a ravenous muppet.
David R: if monte beats back the attack of a ravenous muppet, he back tracks enough to duck the conedit lambast that the muppet fucked up... or something.

David R: This will fit nicely into my forthcoming publication, "Expressing Love Through Sarcasm: An Introspective Analysis on the Impact of Sociological Trends in Game Development"

Jerome: That's just it though; people don't care about you, they just care about your badges. I want to be a girl scout...

Kain (distressed): It's asking me if I want to buy this, but the only choices are 'OK' and 'Yes'!

James: Oh great, now everyone's calling me '#5, Beef'.

Jordan: The noise suppressor disc was suggested by Megaphone Jerome. Don't look up. It's an irony supernova.

Elan: That was quite a look of concentrated hatred you gave that window.
Jordan: What? Oh, it wasn't the window... I just saw you in it.

Randy: It's hard to aim for a guy's ass.

Monte: Nate! Come here, Nate. Sit on my lap.
Nate: Again?

Jordan: Randy, you're notorious for flying out of your body, passing through a wall, spinning wildly and then complaining that you're confused.

David R: So, if you were a nine-foot fish-person-monster, what sort of treasure would you have in your aquatic realm?
Elan: Um, stuff that floated down, or remnants of my previous civilization.
David R: What if you could only have coins, forks, or bowls?

Nate: She-Ra was *so* hot. She was He-Man's twin sister.
Brian: Are you saying He-Man is hot?
Nate: ... maybe.

Jerome: (watching Alizee video) Check out this undulation Rye-gel!

David: Check this out.
Jordan: That's donkey-pr0n!
David: ...
Jordan: ...
David: So is that good or bad?

David: Wow, our loading screens look like DX.
Jordan: Yeah, with poop-skates.

Nate: I'm not laughing at your idea. I'm laughing at you.

David (via Email): We should be a band that only does covers of covers.
Kent: We could call ourselves "under the covers"....and the album cover would be all three of us on a big king-sized bed, with covers pulled up to our necks, looking out naughtily.

Heather (on ICQ): You are so ON it dude
David: Gots to keep ya unblocked
Heather: Yeah like a ..... nevermind
David: Rolaid?

David: Shit dude, that guy is the Bob Ross of Sand
Elan: He even has a happy little tree.

Heather: You know who's really good at rotating things is Cobb.

Jerome: So dude I just did a dump on the Museum!
David: Literally or figuratively?

Monte: There will be no talk of shaving each other at work.

Chris: You are scary and manly
David: Wow, no one has ever said that to me when I had my clothes on!

Jerome (on bloodspatter particle effects): Free lunch for a week to any programmer that sneaks that shit in after hours!!!!! BLOOD IS COOL - BLOOD SELLS GAMES - DEADLY SHADOWS - BLOOD - TERROR MAYHEM! SELL MONEY!

Jordan (in Garrett voice): "Those are City Watch Guards. You can tell because they're watching the city."

Jerome: I'm tired... I want me mommy.
David: Yeah... so do we.

Kent (on ICQ): Didnt see you earlier, i had your check in my pocket. Oh well.
David: Sorry, I'm not going to get it out of your pocket. You're going to have to drop it on my desk. And step away.

David: Every time you don't cap a mesh, you kill a kitten.
Nate: That's why I stick with masturbation.

Elan (on ICQ): Nothing says player agency like baking.

Jordan (on Randy): He's not against humor, he's just against defecation.

Dave K. (looking at source code): So over here, in the BlameUnsolvedMurdersOn() function--
Wendy: That is the coolest function name ever. They should have that at the FBI.

Jordan (watching Havok physics in game): Rock-a-bye barreeeell, on the treeeetop...

Serg: Jerome... are you going to play that new game, City of Heroes? I want you to be my sidekick.

Matt W: How'd the killing spree go?
Dave K: Good. Nobody ever stopped fleeing.