Kolya on 12/11/2012 at 09:54
Quote Posted by Captain Spandex
'He' is me.
And please
do list even one fallacy uttered within the confines of the video, stud.
It's not so much that you're wrong about single points, it's that you took the fast talking from Yahtzee, your fashion sense from a Sisters of Mercy video and added the exaggerated cursing lingo of 15 year old gamers.
All of which makes you come across like a self-important moron who's trying way too hard to become internet famous. God-fucking-speed.
SubJeff on 12/11/2012 at 11:16
Quote Posted by Captain Spandex
'He' is me.
And please
do list even one fallacy uttered within the confines of the video, stud.
There are too many to go into and I don't care enough.
zacharias on 12/11/2012 at 12:08
Quote Posted by Kolya
It's not so much that you're wrong about single points, it's that you took the fast talking from Yahtzee, your fashion sense from a Sisters of Mercy video and added the exaggerated cursing lingo of 15 year old gamers.
All of which makes you come across like a self-important moron who's trying way too hard to become internet famous. God-fucking-speed.
Kolya, goddamit that post was a thing of beauty :D
Vivian on 12/11/2012 at 12:09
Captain Spandex, some interesting points, but take the (fucking) shades off and do less cocaine, you sound like Quentin Tarantino's annoying little brother.
Gryzemuis on 12/11/2012 at 12:25
It's the equivalent of writing a huge block of text, all in caps, without any paragraphs. You immediately feel a disgust "I'm not gonna read all that". (Now: "I'm not gonna listen to that").
Unfortunately it seems to be the latest fashion in video-game review.
I am not a native speaker. And although my English is good for a foreigner (I hope), presenting text in that fashion makes it extra hard for me to keep track of what is being said. Not enough time to process the semantics when I need to spend my full focus on parsing.
Melan on 12/11/2012 at 13:26
The Angry Internet Nerd shtick was fresh and interesting when Captain Maddox and Something Awful were doing it in 1999. Thirteen years later, it's just... I dunno. Sad?:tsktsk:
catbarf on 12/11/2012 at 16:51
I'm sorry, Captain Spandex, but that was just bad.
'Given the developmental antecedents of the studio that spawned thee, there is absolutely no viable reason why I should not wanna while away the wee morning hours fondling every clammy crevice of your venerated no-no places, yet the combination of well-meaning design choices that were ultimately calamitous, a story that makes even the most perverted Sonic the Hedgehog fan fic fever dream seem like Tennyson, and some of the most repugnant derivative art design you... will... EVER have the misfortune to behold have somehow congealed, unceremoniously sucked this game's potential drier than Bob Newhart's memoirs.'
As an exercise, let's re-write this into something useful.
'Given the history of the studio that designed it, there is no reason why Dishonored shouldn't be an excellent game. However, the flawed design choices, poor story, and unoriginal and ugly art design combine to form a game that does not nearly live up to its potential.'
If you're trying to review a game, you should be as straightforward as possible. If you're trying to be funny by angrily ranting at videogames and using lots of ten-dollar words and juvenile humor, that ship has already sailed. There might be some decent points in there but they're buried under unnecessary zings and obscure pop culture.
Jason Moyer on 12/11/2012 at 17:50
FYI, and maybe it's different if you're an idiot and not playing on Very Hard, but enemies can see you if you're completely concealed and lean into their view. I had it happen several times during my playthrough and it's easily reproducable. I'm assuming it depends on the difficulty since one of the things the difficulty setting modifies is the AI's awareness level.
Sulphur on 12/11/2012 at 20:40
That does read like Yahtzee, doesn't it? Internet schtick aside, the level of scathing exaggeration on display can't honestly be used to inform anyone's opinion on the game.
